A beef with Rotten Tomatoes

Today, huge nerd that I am, I wandered on to rottentomatoes.com and browsed their list of best reviewed sci-fi films ever. Their countdowns are unfortunately structured so that the user must go through the entire list backwards, one movie at a time. The quickest way to browse the list is to go by tens towards the front. Opposite of user-friendly.

Finally I got to the top ten. Wondering why Star Wars: A New Hope was so far down on the list (#9, behind Minority Report and Children of Men), I went to read the reviews. You have to be a pretty big cynic to give Star Wars a bad review, especially when in 1977 it was the coolest thing that had ever happened in a movie theater.

What I found was terribly disappointing. The reviews cited on Rotten Tomatoes do not include any from the original release! Instead, they are all prolific comments like "Classic!" There are bad reviews that claim triteness and shallowness... all from 1997.

I find a "Top Reviewed ________" list extremely less credible when it omits any period reviews from older movies and relies solely on jaded analysis of the DVD re-releases. Thoughts?

Save the cheerleader...

Despite the infamous tagline, Heroes is worth your time if you haven't already checked it out. It's hard to say anything without spoiling, so let me say this: some characters are lovable, others are scary, others can't decide which they are. I still don't know whose side some people are on.

I think I set a new record of general ridiculousness yesterday when I watched the (intense!) finale of Season One about 50 minutes before watching the premiere of Season Two live. It's going to be a complicated season, but that's part of what makes this show fun.

All I'm saying is, wtf happened to Peter?

I am officially the lamest blogger ever.

HOWEVER, I'm getting back on the horse, first of all by posting an arbitrary Office picture. John Krasinski with an iPod... it doesn't get any sexier than this.

It's been a long summer, and a long first month or so of school. I'm tired of movies not being a part of my life. So, a few short points of interest:

1) This is a convenient website: http://videoeta.com/ Damn you, Simpsons Movie, for not being released sooner.

2) Important forthcoming dates: Office Season 4 starts Thursday. Heroes Season 2 starts Monday. Those actually weren't so much dates but days. Oops.

3) I recently gained one tiny, tiny, tiny granule of respect for Grey's Anatomy, and that is because they name all of the episodes after songs. The two part episode called "The End of the World" and "As We Know It" is my favorite. So, think about a grain of sugar, and you now know the exact size of my respect for that show, which is bigger than it used to be, but very small indeed.

4) Today I rented "The Tiger and the Snow", one of Roberto Benigni's latest projects, naturally starring him and his wife and directed by him, also with an appearance by Jean Reno, whom we all know is a badass. It has a 6.9 on imdb, and since it's not a cult film I tend to be a little more trusting of their rating system. So although I am excited, I'm also a shade worried.

5) I'm writing this last one to keep myself honest. I need to post about Hairspray, which was hilarious, Heroes, which kicks ass, and Arrested Development, which might be the greatest thing to ever happen to Planet Earth, and I don't mean Prince's new album.

Kubrick

I've long been a fan of Kubrick and am always frustrated when Speilberg is mentioned ahead of him in terms of great directors. How many directors have the courage to take on really controversial material. Kubrick made film versions of TWO of the most controversial novels of the 20th century: Lolita and A Clockwork Orange.

His IMDb stats are stagering and unparalleled. Dismissing the handful of short films and documentaries he did prior to 1956, Kubrik directed just eleven movies over 43 years. Here they are in ascending order based on IMDb rating:

Eyes Wide Shut (1999) - 7.0
Lolita (1962) - 7.6
Barry Lyndon (1975) - 8.0
Spartacus (1960) - 8.0 #188
The Killing (1956) - 8.2 #135
Full Metal Jacket (1987) - 8.3 #94
2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) - 8.3 #78
The Shining (1980) - 8.4 #60
A Clockwork Orange (1971) - 8.4 #50
Paths of Glory (1957) - 8.5 #42
Dr. Strangelove (1964) - 8.7 #21

Blood Diamond

Great, great movie. What could have easily been turned into a standard, unimportant action movie was handled with great care by Edward Zwick (Glory). The acting was spot-on. DiCaprio is like a real life Han Solo. The Oscar nominations were well deserved, in fact, there are probably a few nominees that owe Blood Diamond an apology for taking a spot it deserved in the Best Picture category (sorry, The Queen, get out).

Children of Men

Dark, raw, disturbing, and visually stunning. I wouldn't have thought this would be a movie I'd regret not having seen in the theater. I don't know if this movie should be #122 on IMDb, but it certain needs to be watched by everyone as an unfortunately accurate insight into the human condition.

A pirate's life for me... maybe

So, I definitely paid $25 for my ticket to Pirates III, but I guess that is to be expected in London's West End. Even the indie theater there is $20 per ticket. Also, the theater was almost empty, ergo London has officially been given the rating of "lame" as a movie town until further notice (Harry Potter).

Anyway, last night I saw At World's End in Leicester Square in a huge theater that has absolutely nothing on the Warren. It was three hours long. However, so much plot stuff was going on that it was hard to deal with the characters at all. I was happy to see a little bit more time spent with Will and Elizabeth. Elizabeth turns out to be a complete badass and that part I loved.

What I loved the most about this movie, though, was the ending. It was really sad (it could be taken as not that sad, but I thought it was pretty painful), so that was actually a nice surprise. I don't prefer movies to have sad endings, but the way they handled it in Pirates III redeemed them a little bit for Pirates II. Let's just say it took the movie down a couple of notches on the Popcorn-O-Meter, which in the dire situation of this franchise, is a good thing.

For this reason and others, At World's End also pandered a lot less to the section of its fanbase that is easily entertained. Dead Man's Chest was pretty much the Johnny Depp-being-hilarious-but-ultimately-undermining-the-franchise's-value show. This isn't the case in the latest installment. That is not to say that At World's End suffers from a lack of swashbuckling. It was much less dependent on physical comedy and re-used Disnefied jokes.

So, see it because you should finish out the series, but a la the Matrix, this trilogy might have been better off with just the initial film. No pirate movie and few of any genre will ever be as cool as POTC: The Curse of the Black Pearl.